The Trouble With Gold
by The Hash Slinging Slasher
Summary: When a European scientist discovers the formula for alchemy, Artemis immediately decides that it really ought to be his instead. Minerva, as well as Xavier Banks, decide this as well. The resulting clash of wits and guns will be remembered by all.


**Fowl Manor, Ireland**

Artemis Fowl took a long sip of coffee before returning his focus to the final chapter of his romance novel. He sank further into his leather armchair and closed his eyes.

Butler opened the door; Artemis opened his eyes.

"You know I don't like to be disturbed when I'm writing, Butler," Artemis said testily.

"I believe that you will find this news worthy of the interruption it's caused," said butler. He led Artemis downstairs to the living room, where he turned on the T.V.

A thin, stiff looking man was being interviewed by Matt Lauer. His dark brown scarf made him look strangely cold as he looked at Matt curiously with grey-blue eyes.

"What do you plan on doing with your discovery?" Matt asked, that news-person fake curiosity plastered all over his face.

"I plan on to use it for the greater good of humanity, and to-"

Artemis rolled his eyes. "Butler, I hardly believe-"

"Artemis," Butler paused, fearing his charges reaction, "Dr. Sivinski here has discovered the formula necessary for alchemy."

Artemis stood in shock for several seconds. He opened his mouth, but shut it again-clearly at a loss for words.

"So, Artemis, this means that it is possible, and that you should continue you research on the subject."

Artemis stared savagely at the TV. "You are not stupid enough to believe that that is what my reaction would be, Butler."

Butler sighed. "I'll prepare the jet, Artemis."

**Chateau Paradizo, France**

"If you would raise you arms, Madame."

Minerva raised her arms. She was having her dress for the _Fleuve _Ball tailored.

Beads of sweat rolled down the tailors face. This dress easily cost more than he made in a year.

"Please be careful, I hate to think of what my father will do to you if you damage this dress."

"Of course Madame."

Minerva waited patiently, until the tailor announced that she was done. Minerva walked over to the mirror, carefully examined every stitch, then nodded to the tailor.

Suddenly, Beethoven's Fifth began to play. Minerva walked quickly over to a small wooden stool and picked up her phone. It was not an incoming call, but _Popular Science _'s news letter. Minerva liked to know what was going on in the scientific community.

She flicked her finger across the screen, and began to skin through the text.

Her eyes lit up. She exited out of the article, and speed dialed her father.

"Hello Father... no, yes, it's amazing. Could you please get the jet ready? I'll explain when I get home. Thank you Father."

Minerva smiled. She knew one other teenage genius who was bound to be after something like this. Artemis Fowl.

**Isle of Man, England**

Unbeknownst to Artemis or Minerva, a third teenage genius was finding out about Dr. Sivinski's formula.

Xavier sighed as he looked over his daunting schedule. CEO meeting at 11:30, general staff meeting at 12:45, conference call with Mr. Fox at 2:00. Crane&Sparrow's didn't run itself.

Xavier stepped out onto his balcony and took a deep breath of the sea air. The warm sun shone of his long blonde hair, and reflected off his mischievous green eyes.

A vibration in his pocket interrupted the peaceful moment. He took out his phone, and swiftly and irritably moved his finger across the screen. He, like Minerva, liked to know what was happening in the scientific community.

A smile slowly formed on Xavier's face. He had stolen many of _Popular Science_'s headline items over the years, but this would be by far the biggest and most challenging.

He would later look back upon this thought as one of the most incredible understatements he had ever made.

**Author's Note:** This chapter was more like an introduction chapter, and the second chapter (which will be coming very soon) will have much more action. Meaning, please don't judge this by its boring prologue. Also, it would be fantastically bubblingly awesome if you _**REVIEWED.**_

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Artemis Fowl, or any of the Artemis Fowl characters, or anything like that.


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